Never Saved
by romirola
Summary: While on a hunt, Dean reads the book "Mystery Spot" the Chuck publshised. He soon finds himself in Sam's position, and can't find a way out. Refers to 3x11, "Mystery Spot" and 4x18, "The Monster At The End Of This Book". Spoilers up to 4x18, nothing more.
1. Prolouge

**Hello everyone! Here's a Supernatural fic I started today. I've always wondered what would happened if Dean read some ofthe books the Chuck published. I hope that you like it! Enjoy! **

**Chapter 1- Prologue**

"Oh my freaking' God! I hate camping! Why? Why the hell do people do this by choice? What is our society coming to?" Dean Winchester disgustedly demanded to the vast woods before him. He sat down on his black sleeping bag and opened a bag of chips.

"Come on, Dean," Sam Winchester jokingly chided. "You just pissed because you're missing that concert." Sam unrolled his own identical sleeping bag so it was perpendicular to Dean's. Once that was settled, he brought in three other bags full of his and Dean's belongings. "Here." He tossed one of the bags to his older brother. "To make up for it, I was your lackey for the day."

"Gee, thanks. That makes up for it," scoffed Dean. "Do you know what I could be doing right now, Sam? Well, I'll tell you. I could be rocking out to some bands playing exclusively Metallica songs for FREE!" he raved. "But, no! Where am I? I'm stuck out in the middle of nowhere on an inside chance that this thing might be a Wendigo. We don't even know if that attack was due to something supernatural!"

"Outside," Sam simply uttered.

"Huh?"

"The expression. You said 'I'm stuck out in the middle of nowhere on an _inside_ chance that this thing might be a Wendigo.' You meant to say that there's an _outside_ chance," corrected Sam.

"Thanks for the grammar lesson, geek-boy." Dean exaggerated rolling his eyes at Sam. "So, what's our next step?" He asked in between crunching of his chips.

"I think we should wait here. We've still got…" Sam paused for a minute. "A couple more miles to walk before we even get in the range of that thing- whatever it is."

"More walking?" Dean indignantly questioned. "We walked so much today I'm surprised my legs are still attached!"

"Stop whining," Sam smiled. "Just be glad we aren't dealing with an Angels versus Demons battle now," he said. Sam rifled through the duffle bag next to him and pulled out an energy bar. Unwrapping his meal, he continued, "So, why are we out here anyway? Shouldn't we be… you know… trying to stop the end of the world?!" Dean could hear the slight edge in Sam's voice that he was trying to cover up.

"I just…" Dean trailed off for a moment before he found his voice. "I don't know, Sam. I mean, do you miss hunting? I mean, really hunting? Just saving people, killing random things all over the country?" Sam didn't answer, so Dean continued. "Because you've got to admit it, Sam, we haven't hunted anything to save anyone in a while."

Sam looked down at his feet. "Yeah, I guess."

Dean could tell Sam was holding back, but didn't press the issue. "It's just gonna be this one quick job, and then back to…"

"Uh-huh," cut off Sam. He quick tried to find something to say to change the subject. "It looks like we're gonna be here for awhile, though," Sam said as he admired the tent he and Dean we're sharing. "Did you bring a deck of cards?"

"Dammit," he whispered to himself. Dean's lip curled unhappily at Sam's mention of the cards. "We're just gonna have to find something else to do." Dean took the other bag and zipped it open. Once he what was in it, his smile was back on his face. He grabbed the duffel on the bottom and turned it over, so all the contents spilled out onto the ground. "Well, at least we can catch up on some reading," he ventured.

Sam cocked his head to the side and picked up one of the many books that were just poured out of the piece of luggage. "_Supernatural_? Seriously? You brought the _Supernatural_ series?"

"Of course!" Dean answered as if it was the most natural thing in the world. The _Supernatural _series, written by the prophet Chuck, was a detailed account of Dean and Sam's lives. "Did you really think I wasn't gonna read these? Besides, it beats staring at these finely carpeted walls."

Sam idly flipped through a random book he picked up and made eye contact with Dean. "Why? We lived through this once already. Why do you want to do this again?"

Dean shrugged with a shadow of a half-smile. "How can you not fall in love with the Dean character?"

Sam pushed a lock of his hair out of his eyes with a laugh. "Oh, totally. He just steals my heart."

"I know!" Dean agreed with mock enthusiasm. "I'm glad you see my side of this."

Sam's brow furrowed as he blink sleepily, trying to study his brother intently. With a sigh, he dropped the book that was in his hands so it landed in the pile. "Whatever. And by the way, I volunteer you for first watch," Sam announced. Without another word, he climbed inside the sleeping bag and turned over so he wasn't facing Dean.

It had always been the Winchester system to have someone always be awake while they were camping. Still, usually it was Dean who laid the first nights' watch on Sam.

Dean was shocked that he had been to slow to see that that's what was on Sam's mind. Seeing that he lost that battle, Dean threw a pillow at Sam's form. "Guess I won't be needing that," he sighed. "It's probably better this way. I mean, you and me both know out of the two of us, you're the one who needs the beauty sleep."

"G'night," Sam slurred, leaving Dean to himself.

"Fine. I'll just catch up on some good reading," spited Dean as he picked a different book up without looking, entitled Mystery Spot.

**So, what do you think? Leave a review! **

**Thanks for reading, and hope to see you next chapter!**


	2. Reading Revelations

**Hello, everyone! Thanks to anyone who reviewed! Those really make my day. I'm going to warn you that this IS a short chapter, but they do get longer as they go on. I hate posting short chapters, but if I don't breka the story up here, it will seem very awkward. Hope you enjoy!**

**Chapter 2- Reading Revelations**

The hours passed by, and Dean didn't even wake Sam when he was supposed to. He was too enthralled with the book he was reading, Mystery Spot. Sure, he had lived through this, but Dean soon realized that he didn't remember half of it. He was sickened with every word that he read.

Over one hundred times, Dean died. And Sam had to watch it, every time. With gross fascination, he read on. Every time he died, he was brought back to life. Dean didn't have to read Chuck's words to know what that would do to his brother. Dean watched Sam die once, but over one hundred times? It was unimaginable to him. What surprised Dean the most were the next three italicized words that he read in the torturous book.

_Six Months Later_

"Six months?" Dean whispered to himself. He stared at the page, shaking his head back and forth. He had to be reading it wrong, right? Sam didn't have to live six months without him? How could he not tell Dean about that? No, it couldn't be. But there it was. Written in black-and-white blood.

Dean felt as if for the rest of the book, he held his breath in. He read as fast as humanly possible; maybe even a little faster than that. When Dean finished the book, he tossed the book aside and let out his breath shakily. For a moment, his vision blurred before him and Dean pressed his hands to his sweating brow.

"Dean?" Sam's voice dragged Dean out of his near break-down. "Umm, you okay?"

"Huh?" Dean snapped back into his usual self. "Yeah, I'm fine. Just about to wake you up from your beauty sleep," he laughed, trying to sound normal.

"Just shut up and move over," Sam growled once he saw Dean was all right.

"Okay, okay!" Dean put up his hands in surrender. "Geez, Sam. What? Wake up on the wrong side of the bed? Oh, wait. There is no bed!"

"You've got three hours," Sam declared. "You want to spend it sleeping or whining and insulting me?"

"Uhh…." Dean looked up, thinking hard. "It's a hard choice, but there's always time to insult you tomorrow! I'll sleep now."

"Whatever," Sam mused.

"G'night, Sammy," Dean bided as he closed his eyes.

His typical dreams of voluptuous and sexy women were nonexistent . In their place was a waking nightmare. Dean still couldn't believe what he had just read. Sam had lived through over one hundred of Dean's deaths, and then had lived six months of one permanent death.

_God, how did he do it?_

**And that's that! So, I've been noticing that this story is getting a lot less reviews/hits than my other _Supernatual_ story. Is it just or a conincidence, or are you guys really not liking the story? Tell me what you think, leave a review!**

**P.S Thansk for reading!**


	3. Dreams Turned To Nightmares

**Wow! I love all these reviews I'm getting! I'm so glad everyone likes it! Thanks to everyone who've alerted/reviewed this story! They really make my day. Here's the next chapter. Enjoy!**

**Chapter 3- Dreams Turned To Nightmares**

"Come on, Dean! Up and At'em!" Sam taunted as he jokingly shook Dean's shoulder. His mile-wide smile irked Dean so early in the morning. Anything that had to do with mornings wasn't Dean's forte. The elder brother slowly pushed himself up and lazily rubbed his face.

"Stop it," he ordered with a low tone.

"Stop what?" innocently asked Sam.

"Stop being all… cheery," Dean spat out tiredly. "It's so disgusting this early."

"Your breath is disgusting this early, too, but you don't see me complaining!" Sam responded back as he ran his fingers through his hair. "You coming, or what?"

Dean stood up and while yawning, stretched his arms out of above his head. "I'll be there in a minute."

"Fine. Five minutes more. I'll go fill up our canteens then," Sam suggested. He slung both his and Dean's canteens over his muscular shoulder and walked out of the tent.

"Is five more minutes really gonna matter?" he grumbled. Dean stumbled out of the makeshift tent. He glanced around and so no sign of his brother. The only life form he found was a deer that was prancing away into the thick trees. "Sam?" No answer came forth. "Sam!?"

Instead of hearing Sam's reply, the sound of a splash was heard instead.

"Sammy?" Dean burst into a run as he headed towards the river. When he reached the body of water, Dean immediately spotted a limp arm sinking into the clear rapids.

"Hang on, Sam! I'm coming!" Dean yelled above the rusting water. He skillfully dove into the stream and began swimming towards Sam's still form that was being whisked away by the whooshing torrents.

After what seemed like an eternity to Dean, he finally reached Sam. Gracefully, Dean hooked his hands around Sam's underarms so he could keep Sam's head above the water. The lump on Sam's head told Dean exactly what he had feared. Sam must've hit his head on a rock.

Once Dean pulled Sam up onto land, he started to push on Sam's stomach, hoping the movement would stimulate Sam's breathing. He intensified his actions when Sam continued not to take a breath, turning slightly blue.

"Come on, Sam. Don't do this to me!" Dean pleaded, still trying to resuscitate Sam. "Don't leave me alone, Sam! Breathe! Dammit, Sammy, breathe!" Tears started to well up in his eyes and trail down Dean's already wet cheeks. "No," he stated simply. "No, no, no, no, NO!" Dean kept repeating, holding Sam close. "No, Sam... Not today, not like this! Please, please, come back…"

**********

Dean woke up with a start .

"Come on, Dean! Up and at'em!" Sam taunted as he jokingly shook Dean's shoulder.

"Huh?" Dean stood straight up and rubbed his eyes. "What… what day is it?" he groggily chocked out.

"Tuesday…" Sam answered slowly with a puzzled look on his face. "That's usually what comes after Monday."

Dean's eyes were fixed on Sam's face. "It can't be…" he murmured softly. "This-" He looked around. "I've already lived through today."

"What?" Sam looked apprehensively at Dean. "It must've been a dream, Dean. I promise, today is Tuesday."

Dean wanted to say more and protest what Sam had just told him. It wasn't a dream. Yesterday was real. Far too real for Dean's liking.

"Fine. I'll go fill up our canteens then," Sam suggested. He slung both his and Dean's canteens over his muscular shoulder and walked out of the tent.

"No!" cried Dean, snatching the containers away from Sam. "I… I will. You just stay here," he ordered, an hurriedly went out to go do that. He left the tent, passing by the same deer as he walked towards the steam.

"Umm… okay?" Sam replied to the air.

**********

"'_That usually follows Monday_,'" Dean mocked to himself. "What a smart ass." He carefully dipped the ash-colored canteens into the stream and held it there.

"Ahhhh!" Sam's anguished scream ripped through the pre-peaceful forest.

"Sam?" Dean dropped the canteen and started to run back to his and Sam's tent with fear making his stomach double over. "I'm coming, Sam!"

The sight that Dean beheld when he got back to the campsite was one that was going to be burned in his memory for all time. Sam was screaming in pain, pinned by a black bear that was ripping him to shreds. Blood was everywhere, and it belonged to Sam. Acting on pure instinct, Dean quickly reached into his pocket for his pistol. Without even having to aim, he shot the bear that was now totally covering Sam four consecutive times until it stopped breathing.

"Sammy?" Dean made his way over to Sam and yanked the black beast off of his brother. "Sam, can you hear me?" Dean dropped to his knees and put his arm around the back of Sam's shoulders, propping him up at an angle.

"H… Hurts, Dean," the injured Sam choked out.

"I know it does, buddy," Dean whispered, trying to inspect all the bite marks and scratches that were seeping Sam's blood. "I know it hurts, Sam, but you gotta fight this one for me… Don't die again, Sam… Please…"

Sam lifted up a shaking hand and touched Dean's cheek as he opened his mouth. Abruptly, the hand went limp against Dean and Sam's eyes closed.

"Sam, Sammy, don't leave me… Please…" Dean sobbed as hot tears were streaming down from his eyes, dripping off his face, onto his dead brother.

**There's that chapter! I hope you like it! Leave me a review to tell me what it is you are thinking! Thanks in advance, and I hope to see you next chapter!**

**P.S. Thanks for reading!**


	4. TimeLoop Trouble

**Hello, again, everyone! I'm so excited about the way this story is turning out, and I'm even more excited that you guys are liking this! Thanks to anyone who has reviewed/alerted/or read! Here's the next chapter! Enjoy!**

**Chapter 4- Time-Loop Trouble**

"Come on, Dean! Up and at'em!" Sam taunted as he jokingly shook Dean's shoulder.

"Sammy?" Dean questioned hesitantly. "It's happening again!" Dean exclaimed as he threw his hands up in the air.

"What?"

"You don't understand, Sam," Dean exclaimed. "I've already lived though today. Twice, in fact. And both times, you died. And then, I would wake up." Dean ran a hand through his short, spiky hair and looked up at his little brother. "And if I'm right, you're going to die today if I don't do something about it."

"You mean that you're like, stuck in some sort of time-loop or something?" wavered Sam. "The last time that happened, it was the Trickster's doing. Has he been in any of your dreams?"

"They're not dreams!" Dean insisted. "It's real, and no, I haven't seen him at all."

"Then let's go look for him!" Sam proposed. "Come on."

"No!" Dean threw his head up so he could look straight at same. "You are not leaving my sight. Not to go get us water…" Dean grabbed the canteens before Sam had even a chance to take them. "And neither am I. This way, you won't have to take a piss, either."

"I- Wha-?" Sam stuttered. "I'm gonna be fine, Dean. Seriously."

"How do I know that?" Dean demanded of Sam. "Just leave it alone, okay? Here, you and me…" Dean pointed to Sam and then himself. "Why don't we _both_ go outside and… see if we can find some food or something. Maybe if I don't leave you alone, you don't die. And if you don't die today, that means I broke the time loop!"

"Sure," Sam agreed dejectedly. "Anything to make you happy."

*********

"See, Sam?" Dean smiled as he brought up some berries to his mouth that he and Sam had just found and picked. Subconsciously, he noticed the same deer prancing away, into the thicker shrubbery the woods held. Dean stopped before the berried touched his mouth, not actually consuming them, so he could gloat. "Boy Scouts would've been a waste of time. I knew these blueberries weren't poisonous from the moment I saw the tree."

Sam stopped chewing with a look of fear in his eyes. "Tree? You mean 'bush', right?" Sam only hoped that he was correcting Dean.

"No. Trees. Why?"

Suddenly not finding the appetizing anymore, he turned his head and spit them out. "There are no blueberry trees. What is thi-" Mid-sentence, Sam paused. His head slumped so he was looking at the ground as he started to sway. "I… uhh…" He doubled over in pain, grasping his stomach. "Oh, God…" he moaned.

"Sam?" Dean reached over to his brother and helped him on his way down to the ground. "Don't tell me those were…"

"Poisonous," Sam weakly finished. "I… I…" Sam struggled to get the words out. His body went limp against Dean's when his breathing started to slow.

"No, no, Sammy," Dean whispered. "I'm sorry. God, why can't I stop this? I was right here, watching this happen to you. And no matter what I do I can't stop it. What? What am I supposed to do?" he bellowed, clutching Sam tightly.

"Dean." The name was expelled through Sam's last breath.

"Sam? Oh, God, Sam not again…"

**********

Dean woke up with a start .

"Come on, Dean! Up and At'em!" Sam taunted as he jokingly shook Dean's shoulder.

**********

For the hundredth time, even though it felt like the thousandth to Dean, he forced himself up to Abruptly shutting his mouth, Dean moved on as if nothing happened. He was silent and cold, but also scaring Sam.

"Dean, a-are you okay?"

Dean really didn't hear Sam ask the question, but out of what was now his habit, he answered Sam bitterly. "No. No, Sam, I am not okay. This is the hundredth day I lived though here, and every day, you die. So, excuse me if I'm not Mr. Happy-Go-Lucky."

"I… Wait, what?" Sam asked, confused beyond reason.

"What do you mean, hundredth day, Dean?" Sam and Dean simultaneously asked the question.

"I told you, Sam. One hundred times. After a while, you start to pick up a couple things."

The thought of the Trickster came to Sam's mind, but even after that horrendous experience, he never told Dean the whole story of what really happened. Besides, what are the odds this was happening now? Instead, Sam totally dismissed it.

"Oh really?" Again, two voices asked the query.

"Yes, really," Dean answered back, losing patience.

"Well, then… Dean Winchester sleeps with a fuzzy little bear at night. Dean Winchester fantasizes about being in bed with George Clooney. Dean Winchester secretly dreams of becoming a… Oh, shut up. This is stupid!" Every word that Sam thought was coming off the top of his head was actually matched, syllable for syllable, by Dean.

"I'm not crazy, Sam," insisted Dean. "This, all this is happening. You've died so many times. And every time I'm there, trying to save you and I can't, okay? I can't do it!"

"Dean, I… Oh my God!" Sam stiffened and backed up from the tent's opening. A deer, that deer Dean had been seeing every day, walked into their tent and stayed there.

"What the…" Dean started to wonder. His questions were soon answered when the deer morphed into the very same Trickster that always gave Dean and Sam one hell of a headache.

"Hello, boys," the Trickster greeted. "Have you missed me?"

Before Sam could even react to the Trickster's appearance, Dean grasped his collar and pinned him down to the floor. "Undo this time loop you put me in, and I'll let you leave here in… only two or three pieces."

"Wow!" the Trickster scoffed. "I can't believe I actually had to show you that this was me. You couldn't even figure it out on your own. You're useless."

"I will rip you in two," Dean stated simply, tightening his hold on the Trickster's lavender shirt.

"Sure you will, buddy," the Trickster placated. "Well, you read the book. What comes next?"

His temper rising, Dean was about to open his mouth, but instead, the Trickster snapped his fingers, and was gone in the blink of an eye.

**There's chapter 4 for you! I hope you liked it! Tell me what you think in a review! I love hearing from everyone! Thanks in advance, and I hope you enjoyed it!**

**P.S. Thanks for reading!**


	5. Denying The Future

**Hello, everyone! Thanks to everyone who's left a review! Here is the last chapter of this story. I really hope you like it! Enjoy.**

**Chapter 5: Denying The Future**

Dean's eyes snapped open and viewed the same horrible morning again. He jumped up at attentions, started throwing some gear into his pack, calling at Sam. "Get up, get up!" he urged Sam.

"What?" Sam sleepily asked him. "Why…?"

"NOW!" Dean ordered, and Sam didn't disobey. He knew that if Dean had the gut instinct to leave like this, it must be important.

"Okay, okay," Sam whispered as he, out of habit, he started outside to take down the tent. Before Dean could stop him, Sam had already made a couple steps outside.

A sudden shot rang out, and Dean heard Sam fall to the ground with a thud.

The sound of far-away of rustling leaves told Dean that someone was running away. It was probably a novice deer hunter that didn't know a gun butt from his own. He couldn't face what he hit, and chose not to, and now, because of that coward's stray bullet, Sam was dying. Again.

"Sam!" He ran outside and sank to the ground beside Sam's body. "Not again, Sam not again." Although he knew what happened next, Dean couldn't help but mutter, "Oh, God… NO!" He squeezed his eyes shut and popped them back open again. "No… no… I'm supposed to wake up! Oh, God… Sam… Sam!" he cried. "Why can't I wake up?"

In a fury of rage and grief, Dean took out the gun that he always carried with him and put it up to his head. The very thought of living six months without Sam was too much for Dean to bear. "This is for you, Sammy," he sighed, totally defeated. He pulled back the safety of the gun, but instead, it disappeared into thin air before he could pull the trigger.

"Dean, Dean, Dean," the Trickster sighed. "You are pathetic, don't you agree?" he questioned, but continued without waiting for an answer. "Sam there lasted six months with you dead and gone. You can barely last six minutes. Now, what does that say about you two? The way I read into it, it says that either Sam here doesn't care about you as much as you do him, or you're a weakling. Sad either way, isn't it?"

Dean's face turned red with anger.

"You see…" the Trickster persisted. "You didn't save Sam when you went to Hell. Oh, no."

"I died for him," Dean choked out. "And was tortured every minute after that. I…"

"You didn't save him, and you still can't. You'll never save your brother from what's about to come." With that last 'lesson', the Trickster snapped his fingers, and disappeared into oblivion.

********

Dean's eyes popped open once again, but this time, it wasn't morning. It was still pitch black out, and Sam still slept peacefully. It was all Dean could do not to weep at the sight of his little brother there, still alive.

"Sam, Sam!"

Sam stirred and forced himself up. "Oh, come on…" he complained. "It couldn't have been three hours yet…"

"No… It… What?" Dean tried to understand what had just happened. The Trickster reversed the time loop. "What do you remember?"

"I was sleeping!" Sam retorted back with a crooked brow. "Are you drunk?" he asked after a pause.

"No!" Dean denied, although at this moment, he wished he was. "Look, umm, well…" he stuttered.

"What is it, Dean?" Sam finally confronted. "Just tell me."

"The Trickster…" he explained haltingly. "The book series.. _Supernatural_. I read Mystery Spot-"

"What?!" Sam jumped out of his skin.

"And… the Trickster, he came here… Sent me in a time loop, too. Except you died instead. Oh, God, Sam, it was awful. Every day, I knew what was going to happen to you, and I couldn't stop it!" Never, not once, did I save you! Why didn't you tell me?" he demanded hotly. "How could you keep this from me?!"

"Because I didn't want to face it!" Sam shot back. "Because the last thing I wanted to do was have to relive any of it! Six months, Dean! I spent six months alone!"

"I know," Dean solemnly replied. "That last time, when I realized you were dead, and that I had to go on without you, I tried to shoot myself right then and there. And then that douche showed up and…" Dean knew that Sam could tell where the story was going and trailed off.

Sam didn't say anything. Dean could tell there was a darker, more detached look on his face. It was too anxious. He had been anxious and moody the last couple weeks, but Dean didn't know why.

"I'm sorry you had to go through that," he simply stated, and went back to sleep, leaving Dean there, in the dark.

That wasn't like Sam. Usually, he'd be insisting on discussing the whole thing. It was, always had been, his way of dealing.

"What's happening to you, Sammy?" Dean whispered into the night, with no one around to hear him. He would've expected Sam to answer him back, but instead, another voice rang in his ear.

_You didn't, you couldn't, and you'll never save your brother from what's about to come…_

**The End**

**That's the end! Soon, I'll be posting a full version of the story! What did you think of the ending? Leave me the answer in a review!**

**Thanks for reading!**


	6. Never Saved Full Story

**Never Saved**

**Chapter 1- Prologue**

"Oh my freakin' God! I hate camping! Why? Why the hell do people do this by choice? What is our society coming to?" Dean Winchester disgustedly demanded to the vast woods before him. He sat down on his black sleeping bag and opened a bag of chips.

"Come on, Dean," Sam Winchester jokingly chided. "You just pissed because you're missing that concert." Sam unrolled his own identical sleeping bag so it was perpendicular to Dean's. Once that was settled, he brought in three other bags full of his and Dean's belongings. "Here." He tossed one of the bags to his older brother. "To make up for it, I was your lackey for the day."

"Gee, thanks. That makes up for it," scoffed Dean. "Do you know what I could be doing right now, Sam? Well, I'll tell you. I could be rocking out to some bands playing exclusively Metallica songs for FREE!" he raved. "But, no! Where am I? I'm stuck out in the middle of nowhere on an inside chance that this thing might be a Wendigo. We don't even know if that attack was due to something supernatural!"

"Outside," Sam simply uttered.

"Huh?"

"The expression. You said 'I'm stuck out in the middle of nowhere on an _inside_ chance that this thing might be a Wendigo.' You meant to say that there's an _outside_ chance," corrected Sam.

"Thanks for the grammar lesson, geek-boy." Dean exaggerated rolling his eyes at Sam. "So, what's our next step?" He asked in between crunching of his chips.

"I think we should wait here. We've still got…" Sam paused for a minute. "A couple more miles to walk before we even get in the range of that thing- whatever it is."

"More walking?" Dean indignantly questioned. "We walked so much today I'm surprised my legs are still attached!"

"Stop whining," Sam smiled. "Just be glad we aren't dealing with an Angels versus Demons battle now," he said. Sam rifled through the duffle bag next to him and pulled out an energy bar. Unwrapping his meal, he continued, "So, why are we out here anyway? Shouldn't we be… you know… trying to stop the end of the world?!" Dean could hear the slight edge in Sam's voice that he was trying to cover up.

"I just…" Dean trailed off for a moment before he found his voice. "I don't know, Sam. I mean, do you miss hunting? I mean, really hunting? Just saving people, killing random things all over the country?" Sam didn't answer, so Dean continued. "Because you've got to admit it, Sam, we haven't hunted anything to save anyone in a while."

Sam looked down at his feet. "Yeah, I guess."

Dean could tell Sam was holding back, but didn't press the issue. "It's just gonna be this one quick job, and then back to…"

"Uh-huh," cut off Sam. He quick tried to find something to say to change the subject. "It looks like we're gonna be here for awhile, though," Sam said as he admired the tent he and Dean we're sharing. "Did you bring a deck of cards?"

"Dammit," he whispered to himself. Dean's lip curled unhappily at Sam's mention of the cards. "We're just gonna have to find something else to do." Dean took the other bag and zipped it open. Once he what was in it, his smile was back on his face. He grabbed the duffel on the bottom and turned it over, so all the contents spilled out onto the ground. "Well, at least we can catch up on some reading," he ventured.

Sam cocked his head to the side and picked up one of the many books that were just poured out of the piece of luggage. "_Supernatural_? Seriously? You brought the _Supernatural_ series?"

"Of course!" Dean answered as if it was the most natural thing in the world. The _Supernatural _series, written by the prophet Chuck, was a detailed account of Dean and Sam's lives. "Did you really think I wasn't gonna read these? Besides, it beats staring at these finely carpeted walls."

Sam idly flipped through a random book he picked up and made eye contact with Dean. "Why? We lived through this once already. Why do you want to do this again?"

Dean shrugged with a shadow of a half-smile. "How can you not fall in love with the Dean character?"

Sam pushed a lock of his hair out of his eyes with a laugh. "Oh, totally. He just steals my heart."

"I know!" Dean agreed with mock enthusiasm. "I'm glad you see my side of this."

Sam's brow furrowed as he blink sleepily, trying to study his brother intently. With a sigh, he dropped the book that was in his hands so it landed in the pile. "Whatever. And by the way, I volunteer you for first watch," Sam announced. Without another word, he climbed inside the sleeping bag and turned over so he wasn't facing Dean.

It had always been the Winchester system to have someone always be awake while they were camping. Still, usually it was Dean who laid the first nights' watch on Sam.

Dean was shocked that he had been to slow to see that that's what was on Sam's mind. Seeing that he lost that battle, Dean threw a pillow at Sam's form. "Guess I won't be needing that," he sighed. "It's probably better this way. I mean, you and me both know out of the two of us, you're the one who needs the beauty sleep."

"G'night," Sam slurred, leaving Dean to himself.

"Fine. I'll just catch up on some good reading," spited Dean as he picked a different book up without looking, entitled Mystery Spot.

**Chapter 2- Reading Revelations**

The hours passed by, and Dean didn't even wake Sam when he was supposed to. He was too enthralled with the book he was reading, Mystery Spot. Sure, he had lived through this, but Dean soon realized that he didn't remember half of it. He was sickened with every word that he read.

Over one hundred times, Dean died. And Sam had to watch it, every time. With gross fascination, he read on. Every time he died, he was brought back to life. Dean didn't have to read Chuck's words to know what that would do to his brother. Dean watched Sam die once, but over one hundred times? It was unimaginable to him. What surprised Dean the most were the next three italicized words that he read in the torturous book.

_Six Months Later_

"Six months?" Dean whispered to himself. He stared at the page, shaking his head back and forth. He had to be reading it wrong, right? Sam didn't have to live six months without him? How could he not tell Dean about that? No, it couldn't be. But there it was. Written in black-and-white blood.

Dean felt as if for the rest of the book, he held his breath in. He read as fast as humanly possible; maybe even a little faster than that. When Dean finished the book, he tossed the book aside and let out his breath shakily. For a moment, his vision blurred before him and Dean pressed his hands to his sweating brow.

"Dean?" Sam's voice dragged Dean out of his near break-down. "Umm, you okay?"

"Huh?" Dean snapped back into his usual self. "Yeah, I'm fine. Just about to wake you up from your beauty sleep," he laughed, trying to sound normal.

"Just shut up and move over," Sam growled once he saw Dean was all right.

"Okay, okay!" Dean put up his hands in surrender. "Geez, Sam. What? Wake up on the wrong side of the bed? Oh, wait. There is no bed!"

"You've got three hours," Sam declared. "You want to spend it sleeping or whining and insulting me?"

"Uhh…." Dean looked up, thinking hard. "It's a hard choice, but there's always time to insult you tomorrow! I'll sleep now."

"Whatever," Sam mused.

"G'night, Sammy," Dean bided as he closed his eyes.

His typical dreams of voluptuous and sexy women were nonexistent . In their place was a waking nightmare. Dean still couldn't believe what he had just read. Sam had lived through over one hundred of Dean's deaths, and then had lived six months of one permanent death.

_God, how did he do it?_

**Chapter 3- Dreams Turned To Nightmares**

"Come on, Dean! Up and At'em!" Sam taunted as he jokingly shook Dean's shoulder. His mile-wide smile irked Dean so early in the morning. Anything that had to do with mornings wasn't Dean's forte. The elder brother slowly pushed himself up and lazily rubbed his face.

"Stop it," he ordered with a low tone.

"Stop what?" innocently asked Sam.

"Stop being all… cheery," Dean spat out tiredly. "It's so disgusting this early."

"Your breath is disgusting this early, too, but you don't see me complaining!" Sam responded back as he ran his fingers through his hair. "You coming, or what?"

Dean stood up and while yawning, stretched his arms out of above his head. "I'll be there in a minute."

"Fine. Five minutes more. I'll go fill up our canteens then," Sam suggested. He slung both his and Dean's canteens over his muscular shoulder and walked out of the tent.

"Is five more minutes really gonna matter?" he grumbled. Dean stumbled out of the makeshift tent. He glanced around and so no sign of his brother. The only life form he found was a deer that was prancing away into the thick trees. "Sam?" No answer came forth. "Sam!?"

Instead of hearing Sam's reply, the sound of a splash was heard instead.

"Sammy?" Dean burst into a run as he headed towards the river. When he reached the body of water, Dean immediately spotted a limp arm sinking into the clear rapids.

"Hang on, Sam! I'm coming!" Dean yelled above the rusting water. He skillfully dove into the stream and began swimming towards Sam's still form that was being whisked away by the whooshing torrents.

After what seemed like an eternity to Dean, he finally reached Sam. Gracefully, Dean hooked his hands around Sam's underarms so he could keep Sam's head above the water. The lump on Sam's head told Dean exactly what he had feared. Sam must've hit his head on a rock.

Once Dean pulled Sam up onto land, he started to push on Sam's stomach, hoping the movement would stimulate Sam's breathing. He intensified his actions when Sam continued not to take a breath, turning slightly blue.

"Come on, Sam. Don't do this to me!" Dean pleaded, still trying to resuscitate Sam. "Don't leave me alone, Sam! Breathe! Dammit, Sammy, breathe!" Tears started to well up in his eyes and trail down Dean's already wet cheeks. "No," he stated simply. "No, no, no, no, NO!" Dean kept repeating, holding Sam close. "No, Sam... Not today, not like this! Please, please, come back…"

**********

Dean woke up with a start .

"Come on, Dean! Up and at'em!" Sam taunted as he jokingly shook Dean's shoulder.

"Huh?" Dean stood straight up and rubbed his eyes. "What… what day is it?" he groggily chocked out.

"Tuesday…" Sam answered slowly with a puzzled look on his face. "That's usually what comes after Monday."

Dean's eyes were fixed on Sam's face. "It can't be…" he murmured softly. "This-" He looked around. "I've already lived through today."

"What?" Sam looked apprehensively at Dean. "It must've been a dream, Dean. I promise, today is Tuesday."

Dean wanted to say more and protest what Sam had just told him. It wasn't a dream. Yesterday was real. Far too real for Dean's liking.

"Fine. I'll go fill up our canteens then," Sam suggested. He slung both his and Dean's canteens over his muscular shoulder and walked out of the tent.

"No!" cried Dean, snatching the containers away from Sam. "I… I will. You just stay here," he ordered, an hurriedly went out to go do that. He left the tent, passing by the same deer as he walked towards the steam.

"Umm… okay?" Sam replied to the air.

**********

"'_That usually follows Monday_,'" Dean mocked to himself. "What a smart ass." He carefully dipped the ash-colored canteens into the stream and held it there.

"Ahhhh!" Sam's anguished scream ripped through the pre-peaceful forest.

"Sam?" Dean dropped the canteen and started to run back to his and Sam's tent with fear making his stomach double over. "I'm coming, Sam!"

The sight that Dean beheld when he got back to the campsite was one that was going to be burned in his memory for all time. Sam was screaming in pain, pinned by a black bear that was ripping him to shreds. Blood was everywhere, and it belonged to Sam. Acting on pure instinct, Dean quickly reached into his pocket for his pistol. Without even having to aim, he shot the bear that was now totally covering Sam four consecutive times until it stopped breathing.

"Sammy?" Dean made his way over to Sam and yanked the black beast off of his brother. "Sam, can you hear me?" Dean dropped to his knees and put his arm around the back of Sam's shoulders, propping him up at an angle.

"H… Hurts, Dean," the injured Sam choked out.

"I know it does, buddy," Dean whispered, trying to inspect all the bite marks and scratches that were seeping Sam's blood. "I know it hurts, Sam, but you gotta fight this one for me… Don't die again, Sam… Please…"

Sam lifted up a shaking hand and touched Dean's cheek as he opened his mouth. Abruptly, the hand went limp against Dean and Sam's eyes closed.

"Sam, Sammy, don't leave me… Please…" Dean sobbed as hot tears were streaming down from his eyes, dripping off his face, onto his dead brother.

**Chapter 4- Time-Loop Trouble**

"Come on, Dean! Up and at'em!" Sam taunted as he jokingly shook Dean's shoulder.

"Sammy?" Dean questioned hesitantly. "It's happening again!" Dean exclaimed as he threw his hands up in the air.

"What?"

"You don't understand, Sam," Dean exclaimed. "I've already lived though today. Twice, in fact. And both times, you died. And then, I would wake up." Dean ran a hand through his short, spiky hair and looked up at his little brother. "And if I'm right, you're going to die today if I don't do something about it."

"You mean that you're like, stuck in some sort of time-loop or something?" wavered Sam. "The last time that happened, it was the Trickster's doing. Has he been in any of your dreams?"

"They're not dreams!" Dean insisted. "It's real, and no, I haven't seen him at all."

"Then let's go look for him!" Sam proposed. "Come on."

"No!" Dean threw his head up so he could look straight at same. "You are not leaving my sight. Not to go get us water…" Dean grabbed the canteens before Sam had even a chance to take them. "And neither am I. This way, you won't have to take a piss, either."

"I- Wha-?" Sam stuttered. "I'm gonna be fine, Dean. Seriously."

"How do I know that?" Dean demanded of Sam. "Just leave it alone, okay? Here, you and me…" Dean pointed to Sam and then himself. "Why don't we _both_ go outside and… see if we can find some food or something. Maybe if I don't leave you alone, you don't die. And if you don't die today, that means I broke the time loop!"

"Sure," Sam agreed dejectedly. "Anything to make you happy."

*********

"See, Sam?" Dean smiled as he brought up some berries to his mouth that he and Sam had just found and picked. Subconsciously, he noticed the same deer prancing away, into the thicker shrubbery the woods held. Dean stopped before the berried touched his mouth, not actually consuming them, so he could gloat. "Boy Scouts would've been a waste of time. I knew these blueberries weren't poisonous from the moment I saw the tree."

Sam stopped chewing with a look of fear in his eyes. "Tree? You mean 'bush', right?" Sam only hoped that he was correcting Dean.

"No. Trees. Why?"

Suddenly not finding the appetizing anymore, he turned his head and spit them out. "There are no blueberry trees. What is thi-" Mid-sentence, Sam paused. His head slumped so he was looking at the ground as he started to sway. "I… uhh…" He doubled over in pain, grasping his stomach. "Oh, God…" he moaned.

"Sam?" Dean reached over to his brother and helped him on his way down to the ground. "Don't tell me those were…"

"Poisonous," Sam weakly finished. "I… I…" Sam struggled to get the words out. His body went limp against Dean's when his breathing started to slow.

"No, no, Sammy," Dean whispered. "I'm sorry. God, why can't I stop this? I was right here, watching this happen to you. And no matter what I do I can't stop it. What? What am I supposed to do?" he bellowed, clutching Sam tightly.

"Dean." The name was expelled through Sam's last breath.

"Sam? Oh, God, Sam not again…"

**********

Dean woke up with a start .

"Come on, Dean! Up and At'em!" Sam taunted as he jokingly shook Dean's shoulder.

**********

For the hundredth time, even though it felt like the thousandth to Dean, he forced himself up to Abruptly shutting his mouth, Dean moved on as if nothing happened. He was silent and cold, but also scaring Sam.

"Dean, a-are you okay?"

Dean really didn't hear Sam ask the question, but out of what was now his habit, he answered Sam bitterly. "No. No, Sam, I am not okay. This is the hundredth day I lived though here, and every day, you die. So, excuse me if I'm not Mr. Happy-Go-Lucky."

"I… Wait, what?" Sam asked, confused beyond reason.

"What do you mean, hundredth day, Dean?" Sam and Dean simultaneously asked the question.

"I told you, Sam. One hundred times. After a while, you start to pick up a couple things."

The thought of the Trickster came to Sam's mind, but even after that horrendous experience, he never told Dean the whole story of what really happened. Besides, what are the odds this was happening now? Instead, Sam totally dismissed it.

"Oh really?" Again, two voices asked the query.

"Yes, really," Dean answered back, losing patience.

"Well, then… Dean Winchester sleeps with a fuzzy little bear at night. Dean Winchester fantasizes about being in bed with George Clooney. Dean Winchester secretly dreams of becoming a… Oh, shut up. This is stupid!" Every word that Sam thought was coming off the top of his head was actually matched, syllable for syllable, by Dean.

"I'm not crazy, Sam," insisted Dean. "This, all this is happening. You've died so many times. And every time I'm there, trying to save you and I can't, okay? I can't do it!"

"Dean, I… Oh my God!" Sam stiffened and backed up from the tent's opening. A deer, that deer Dean had been seeing every day, walked into their tent and stayed there.

"What the…" Dean started to wonder. His questions were soon answered when the deer morphed into the very same Trickster that always gave Dean and Sam one hell of a headache.

"Hello, boys," the Trickster greeted. "Have you missed me?"

Before Sam could even react to the Trickster's appearance, Dean grasped his collar and pinned him down to the floor. "Undo this time loop you put me in, and I'll let you leave here in… only two or three pieces."

"Wow!" the Trickster scoffed. "I can't believe I actually had to show you that this was me. You couldn't even figure it out on your own. You're useless."

"I will rip you in two," Dean stated simply, tightening his hold on the Trickster's lavender shirt.

"Sure you will, buddy," the Trickster placated. "Well, you read the book. What comes next?"

His temper rising, Dean was about to open his mouth, but instead, the Trickster snapped his fingers, and was gone in the blink of an eye.

**Chapter 5: Denying The Future**

Dean's eyes snapped open and viewed the same horrible morning again. He jumped up at attentions, started throwing some gear into his pack, calling at Sam. "Get up, get up!" he urged Sam.

"What?" Sam sleepily asked him. "Why…?"

"NOW!" Dean ordered, and Sam didn't disobey. He knew that if Dean had the gut instinct to leave like this, it must be important.

"Okay, okay," Sam whispered as he, out of habit, he started outside to take down the tent. Before Dean could stop him, Sam had already made a couple steps outside.

A sudden shot rang out, and Dean heard Sam fall to the ground with a thud.

The sound of far-away of rustling leaves told Dean that someone was running away. It was probably a novice deer hunter that didn't know a gun butt from his own. He couldn't face what he hit, and chose not to, and now, because of that coward's stray bullet, Sam was dying. Again.

"Sam!" He ran outside and sank to the ground beside Sam's body. "Not again, Sam not again." Although he knew what happened next, Dean couldn't help but mutter, "Oh, God… NO!" He squeezed his eyes shut and popped them back open again. "No… no… I'm supposed to wake up! Oh, God… Sam… Sam!" he cried. "Why can't I wake up?"

In a fury of rage and grief, Dean took out the gun that he always carried with him and put it up to his head. "This is for you, Sammy," he sighed, totally defeated. He pulled back the safety of the gun, but instead, it disappeared into thin air before he could pull the trigger.

"Dean, Dean, Dean," the Trickster sighed. "You are pathetic, don't you agree?" he questioned, but continued without waiting for an answer. "Sam there lasted six months with you dead and gone. You can barely last six minutes. Now, what does that say about you two? The way I read into it, it says that either Sam here doesn't care about you as much as you do him, or you're a weakling. Sad either way, isn't it?"

Dean's face turned red with anger.

"You see…" the Trickster persisted. "You didn't save Sam when you went to Hell. Oh, no."

"I died for him," Dean choked out. "And was tortured every minute after that. I…"

"You didn't save him, and you still can't. You'll never save your brother from what's about to come." With that last 'lesson', the Trickster snapped his fingers, and disappeared into oblivion.

********

Dean's eyes popped open once again, but this time, it wasn't morning. It was still pitch black out, and Sam still slept peacefully. It was all Dean could do not to weep at the sight of his little brother there, still alive.

"Sam, Sam!"

Sam stirred and forced himself up. "Oh, come on…" he complained. "It couldn't have been three hours yet…"

"No… It… What?" Dean tried to understand what had just happened. The Trickster reversed the time loop. "What do you remember?"

"I was sleeping!" Sam retorted back with a crooked brow. "Are you drunk?" he asked after a pause.

"No!" Dean denied, although at this moment, he wished he was. "Look, umm, well…" he stuttered.

"What is it, Dean?" Sam finally confronted. "Just tell me."

"The Trickster…" he explained haltingly. "The book series.. _Supernatural_. I read Mystery Spot-"

"What?!" Sam jumped out of his skin.

"And… the Trickster, he came here… Sent me in a time loop, too. Except you died instead. Oh, God, Sam, it was awful. Every day, I knew what was going to happen to you, and I couldn't stop it!" Never, not once, did I save you! Why didn't you tell me?" he demanded hotly. "How could you keep this from me?!"

"Because I didn't want to face it!" Sam shot back. "Because the last thing I wanted to do was have to relive any of it! Six months, Dean! I spent six months alone!"

"I know," Dean solemnly replied. "That last time, when I realized you were dead, and that I had to go on without you, I tried to shoot myself right then and there. And then that douche showed up…" Dean knew that Sam could tell where the story was going and trailed off.

Sam didn't say anything. Dean could tell there was a darker, more detached look on his face. It was too anxious. He had been anxious and moody the last couple weeks, but Dean didn't know why.

"I'm sorry you had to go through that," he simply stated, and went back to sleep, leaving Dean there, in the dark.

That wasn't like Sam. Usually, he'd be insisting on discussing the whole thing. It was, always had been, his way of dealing.

"What's happening to you, Sammy?" Dean whispered into the night, with no one around to hear him. He would've expected Sam to answer him back, but instead, another voice rang in his ear.

_You didn't, you couldn't, and you'll never save your brother from what's about to come…_

**The End**


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